Wow, Really?!

And there I was, laid out on this bed, those soft familiar red flannel sheets underneath my naked body. My arms spread out on either side of me, tied to his foot-board, our new ball-gag placed in my mouth, blindfolded, and my new collar tightly around my neck. He roped it through it's hoops and tightly strung it to the foot-board. Unable to move my head, nor speak, nor see... I was all his to use and I loved every bit of rope and cloth restricting me.

He slapped my face, "Are you my whore?" "Mmmhmm" was all I managed to muffle out.
(Whoa, whoa, whoa wait a minute - Did Morgan just slap my face and use the word whore??! Wow, this is going to be good I think to myself.) "And my whore should want to please me, you want to be a good whore and please me isn't that right?!" As his hands are softly resting on my cheeks.. SLAP, again he slaps my face. I cry out somewhat....
He then binds my breasts with black electrical tape, he slaps them - I pull at my bound arms - I moan - I'm in heaven.

He then spreads my legs, bends them at the knee, wraps the rope around my ankles and then the other end of the rope to the headboard. He then uses the red stretchy cloth wrapping it around my thighs and to the foot board, this only helps in spreading my legs further apart and constricting the movement of my legs. He tells me how I should want to please him, my master. When he says that it's weird, I don't view Morgan as my "Master" even during our play session, because while he's taken on this dominant role, it doesn't have the characteristics of a Master. He lightly slaps my inner thighs with the crop. I'm so surprised by all his actions that I keep thinking; Holy shit I have to remember every minute of this - I have to write about this! And now as I think back (ps this was all written as soon as I got back home) it becomes quite hard to recall what he had done - each and every amazing minute of being his whore.

I then feel his fingers at my cunt, sliding them up and down my slit, I'm dripping wet, he tells me how he loves when his cunt is dripping for him (ok reality check here - will the real Morgan please stand up!). He teases me with his fingers - I moan slowly, softly, I pull at my arms and legs.. they barely move an inch, my back arches, my nipples harden I love this feeling of being bound by him, for him... I moan again, soft purr like moans. I'm craving more... then a vibrating feeling, slowly pushing inside me.. in and out soft and slow for a few strokes, then faster and harder.. fucking me with the vibrator. Quivers are running up and down my body, I'm moaning though the ball gag (which ps - is kinda hurting me at this point) harder quicker the vibrator is pushed in and out of my pussy... and I cum... I deliciously cum for him.
He tells me that is what good whores get - they get fucked, they get to cum. I'm so overwhelmed by his actions, his worlds, my orgasm, that I can barely acknowledge him. He takes the ball-gag out of my mouth, tells me to keep silent but to relax my jaw. With that comment I look forward to feeling his cock on my lips... waiting.. waiting.. waiting.. no cock.. He steps off the bed, he's meddling with something and at this point I have no idea what he could be up to.... I hear his footsteps trail out of the room. I lie there still tied, and blindfolded, it's dark, it's quiet and I can't believe all that he's done to me. The name calling, the slaps to my face, the way I'm bound, I love it all and I'm still in shock by all of these actions.

The New Man

I have no idea where to start this or how to start this and that's why I've put this off.

My new guy.

I've come to the decision that I need to have an open-minded loving man who is interested in the same things as I (sexually speaking here folks) in order for me to be satisfied. I cannot be in a marriage with a completely (ugh I hate this term) vanilla husband. I don't think I'd be happy, I don't think I'd stay faithful. I've been in vanilla relationships, but yearned for more. And so one night while on the computer checking my emails one of these lovely dating sites I saw a picture of a very good-looking man. His pictures were adorable, what he had written about himself - even better, and there in the essay he mentions that he's sexually unconventional and two letters written afterwards "D/s". I couldn't help myself, I rarely contact guys, but he was online at the time and I couldn't resist iming him.

Two months and four dates later...
He's wined me and dined me well. I'm not used to this type of man, well-to-do, smart, down to earth (and yes he's older than I). He intimidates me a bit, I find myself somewhat quieter around him. But I like him; I like our chemistry so far. He's good for me and I think I'm good for him. But there are things about him - I think I'm a little too much of a smart-ass girl for him, and my sarcasm... but that's just me! He reads me well, a little too well; I hate it (ok so I secretly like it a bit)... go figure! He's an alpha male by nature, and resonates just that. I think this is where those smart ass comments conflict with his natural dominance.

Now when it comes to the unconventional sex side... He's put new ideas in my head, new things to do and try. Things that would just blow you all away. Things that blew me away... I have a hard time admitting that I want to try these things (but I do want to), and that I might actually enjoy all of this. When it comes to D/s, he's not looking for the standard D/s roles, he's more interested in the mental aspect of it. (Perfect!)

All of this adds a new dimension to the courting stage we're in- I'm not sure how to handle it. I'm more open with him, more open than I've ever been with anyone who I've been dating for just so long, therefore I don't know how far to go with things, and where to slow down with things.

This is tricky to me, and I have no one to go to for advice... Can't tell my best friend, Misery... Umm things are going well, and we already have fantasies mapped out we'd like to try but we're still getting to know each other...
Do I hold off somewhat, pull back on the relationship? I'm thinking I need to be more of a go-getter right now. I'm feeling as though I've been playing the naughty but yet inhibited girl. Actually I have done just that as he said to me the other night, "Joey you are the most free inhibited person I know". Maybe it's time to raise the stakes, start seeing him more often and do other things rather than going out to dinner. I need to get to know more of him, interact with him... I feel as though I can fall for him. I think this relationship could be amazing but I just have to stop being shy with him, I need to show him more of me, more of Joey.

New Year...

My mind is in a million zillion pieces... It's a new year - did I mention I hate the new year?! Everyone rattle tattles on... starting over, blah, blah, blah, new beginnings, blah, blah, blah, another chance, blah, blah, blah. No - we are not starting over, I don't get to erase my bills and start with a zero balance. It's not a new beginning - it's just a continuance of the day before, we go back to work, we continue dropping off and picking up the kids from school, we do our laundry, cook dinner, etc... our daily lives continue. And it's not another chance - another chance at what?
Just as I always freak out before a birthday - I freak out around the New Year - another instance of how I hate change.

This year brings about changes for me - changes I don't want to face, changes that scare me, changes that I might actually look forward to...

On another note.

Morgan. I'm going up to visit him next weekend, I'm excited.

That's about it for now folks... I was sick with the flu and bed-ridden for quite a few days... I'm feeling better now and hopefully I'll be back in the swing of things.