Thursday, September 15, 2005

The Perfect Storm

It's raining.... It hasn't rained since Morgan left.

It's pouring without the thunder, without the lighting. It's the rainstorm we waited for all summer (how ironic), the rainstorm in which he had the spot picked out... In some cozy, secluded area where we would have deliciously enraptured each other.

I imagine our bodies wet and slick, the rain drops falling onto my face and eyelids, down my cheeks, my hair wet, my fingers sliding down his slick back. His cock sliding in and out... the smell of wet grass, the smell of rain. The sounds around us, my soft whimpers, the quiet noises he makes that I can never even try to describe - and the rain... our two bodies entwined and the rain.

This storm is killing me... I must go out... I just have to go into the rain...



I threw my skirt on, pulled my hair down out of its ponytail, and ran out of my building into the rain. It was pouring, I was drenched in seconds, I ran down the block, and ran, and ran and the tears ran down my face...

I pulled myself together realizing, it's dark and pouring and what the hell am I doing?!! I walked back to my building, up to my apartment... threw my wet clothes off, put on a big cozy heavy robe to dry me off, and then 7 minutes later realized what the hell am I doing it's too hot and humid for this robe!!

Anyway, I felt the need to write to get it out... it makes me feel better.

On a completely different note:
Do any of you actually print out your blog? I know a major reason for having a blog is so that no-one can find it; find out it's yours and so on. But I have this major fear that all of my posts will disappear. That Blogger will somehow lose my blog and my posts, my words will be gone, lost on the information highway somewhere. I've been thinking about printing out my blog and keeping it in a safety deposit box. Your thoughts???


Blogger magdelena said...

I can almost see you, running through the rain, in the dark, through your own darkness. It makes perfect sense; rain soothes and cleanses for all the memories and unfulfilled promises it stokes.

I haven't printed out my blog but like you, I have recently considered doing so. It occured to me while I was printing out 'Beyond You and Me' and securing it within it's own binder, that perhaps I should preserve my own words in this way. I will do so, keeping it safely on my bookshelf. My own myths of love embraced by the writings that most inspire me.

9/15/2005 9:14 AM  
Blogger Innocuous Male said...

A beautiful post, joey -- like Magdelena, I agree with the cleansing nature of rain. It's like a shower for the soul, especially when mingled with your own tears.

I would never print out my blog. Discretionary matters, you know. I take a rather zen outlook on it: if it's meant to exist, it will endure. If it disappears, well there must have been a reason for that. C'est la vie!


9/15/2005 11:01 AM  
Blogger Oswald Croll said...


Go inside and put some pants on, you'll catch your death. Hhhmmm, but what a way to go.

9/15/2005 4:15 PM  
Blogger Jay said...

we write in a journal then i post online so i have a backup first so to speak

9/15/2005 5:53 PM  
Blogger Arashi-KIshu said...

I hope you feel better :)

Never thought about printing out my blog. Maybe I should!

9/15/2005 8:37 PM  
Blogger Adam said...

I reckon you could copy and paste all the entries into Notepad or Word or something.

It's totally a legit concern, what if Blogger just died one day, we'd all feel the loss.

9/16/2005 12:33 AM  
Blogger Adam said...

Hey chicka, I haven't been reading your blog at work because the internet security is hardcore at this new job, so I've just caught up on a whole lot of your life. I'm sorry Morgan moved so far away... poor thing.

I do love how honest you are about everything though, you rock!

9/16/2005 12:35 AM  
Blogger Mermaid Girl said...

I totally think you should save it, do what Adam said, if you have an entire month's worth up on your screen you can just cut and paste that, then it would be nice and quick.

Chin up darling, we are all thinking of you.

9/16/2005 12:44 AM  
Blogger Emmanuel.K.Bensah II said...

Joey, you're doing great so far, but I would suggest that you do what everyone else is suggesting: save your work in word, before posting it. Then get them onto a CD, where it will be stored permanently.

Haven't been t ur blog for some time now, but I cannot think of anything to say that most people have not already said regarding Morgan...

I'll echo innocuousman in taking a "zen" view by saying if it was meant to be, it would have been.

You are stronger than this. You WILL get over him with time.


9/16/2005 2:04 PM  
Blogger chelsea girl said...

Rain rocks. Really. Righteously.

And enough with the alliteration.

I save my blog posts in Word files before uploading. I am a ceaseless and restless editor, and somewhat of a logophile, so I like to craft my prose within a millimeter of it digital life before posting it.

Plus I have a horror of grammatical and typographical errors. So, in short, I have almost everything saved on my harddrives.

*kisses to you, Joey Madison*

9/16/2005 9:55 PM  
Blogger Hafiz said...

Hey girl... your words are still wonderful.

And to preserve them... there are ways to write your entire blogger file to another server and then download that as an archive. I do that ever couple of months... this creates a remote archive if you host your site on a separate server off of Blogger.

9/17/2005 2:53 AM  

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