Tuesday, June 14, 2005

The Boy in the Building

It's about 3am, I recently stumbled into my apartment, not drunk, just mostly tired, and all together not feeling so well. I trip over someone's pair of sandals, curse my sister out deciding that they're hers. I untie my pants, as I walk down the hallway they fall to my ankles I step out of them as I enter my room, leaving them somewhere on the floor, lifting off my shirt tossing it, I fall into bed. Mmmmm... My yummy comfy delicious bed, I stretch out, and lay down thinking about my night at Morgan’s. My cell phone rings, I reach under my pillow - it's Morgan. He can't sleep and wants me to come back over, ha I tell him yea ok suuuure. We're talking for a few more minutes - my door bell. Who the hell is at my door at this time? Phone still in tow I climb out of bed, the bell is still ringing and now the person is knocking - loudly.
"Who is it?"
"Joey, let me in" (I think to myself - Damn, I make one drunken phone call last night and he's at my door the next.)
"Who is it?" (I know very well who it is but I figured I'd play dumb)
Morgan asks, who it is, I tell him I'm not sure but I'll call him back.
Back at the door he's knocking again.
"____ what are you doing here" I ask.
"Just let me in, c'mon"
I tell him to hold on, run to my bedroom and throw on a t-shirt, back at the door, I slightly open it.
"____ what are you doing here it's like 3:30 am"
"Aww Joey let me in, lets hang out"
"No, go home"

This banter goes on for about 5-7 minutes,, he begs to come in, he pulls every line he could try - lets just cuddle, let's talk ... on and on.
He then tries pushing his way in, (he's not forceful or scary to the point that I'm nervous - I kinda want him in, but I kinda don't). He's in, yet he thinks my sister is home so he's quiet; he goes straight to my room and jumps into my bed. (That I didn't really want) I pull him out of my bed.
And off he goes to my living room, and plops on the couch. I walk over to my door, and tell him to leave, he asks me to come over sit down and chat - I do.

Now Building Boy cracks me up. We've known each other since I was 12/13ish. He's always, always had a crush on me. As we've gotten older, a few years ago, I figured why not? Let's try this out... Well I soon found out he is a major relationship phobe. What's he want? The friend with benefits, and while that would work out quite nicely being that he lives in my building, I have no interest in that type of friendship with him. There are also other factors as to why I feel that way... but I'm not going into that. And he's done this before too, at my door after a night out.

We're sitting on the couch, and he tells me how I'm so pretty, so gorgeous and I believe him, I know he truly thinks that. He goes on talking about how he's adored me since way back when.....

And then he says this which is just classic:
Joey you are “it” – you’re it, you’re the one!”
I giggle at him… and reply, “______, I’m not the one, and I’m certainly not your “it” you won’t even date me”
“Well, I have that, ya know...”
I interrupt him, “I know, you have that relationship phobia bullshit”.
He laughs at me, pets my head, and says:
Can’t I pleeeeeease lick your cunt?”

Guys just crack me up!

15 Comments:

Anonymous Sasha said...

LOL I love it.

6/14/2005 1:04 AM  
Blogger Oswald Croll said...

Sports, cheeseburgers and hot women make us stupid....... it's not fair.

6/14/2005 2:04 AM  
Blogger Emmanuel.K.Bensah II said...

strange boy indeed! Certainly not a man...I mean couldn't he control himself so late in the day {so I say rushing to call my gf...}

6/14/2005 7:23 AM  
Blogger Michael K said...

Can't I please lick your cunt? Hahahah, that's fucking hilarious!

6/14/2005 5:27 PM  
Blogger Blue Skies from Pain said...

That's really funny.....did you get him to leave???

6/14/2005 9:51 PM  
Blogger Joey said...

Men are just hilarious!
Yes I finally got him to leave not much longer after that.

6/14/2005 10:36 PM  
Blogger Xavier said...

Omg! That's the best story ever. It should be fiction, but I'm so happy that this is actually someone's blog.

6/14/2005 10:55 PM  
Blogger rodtalks said...

Well, 'can I lick' seems like a reasonable question..... and at least he asked..... and besides, no fair just leaving us hanging there..... he must be someone you're pretty comfortable with if you let him in at 3AMsometing. But it also seems to me that maybe you had to know he was looking for something other than a cup of sugar..... so is there more to this fun story you're not telling us????? but it is a fun story, thanks. OBTW, sounds like Morgan got left holding the..... too bad for Morgan.

6/15/2005 4:43 AM  
Blogger Joey said...

Rodtalks - No there's not much else to the story, after that I laughed and he begged some more, then I pretty much had him leave. Another funny thing was that when he left he walked into the incinerator room (where the garbage goes) instead of going to the elevator!

I'm very comfortable with Building Boy (like I said in the post I've known him since I was 12ish), and yes I knew he was there for more than sugar - but unfortunately he didn't get any! But I had to let him in, just for the fun of it!

I called Morgan back after he left.

6/15/2005 4:39 PM  
Anonymous Wayne said...

I live in a small town, and if my g/f was on the phone at 3am, and someone knocked on my door, I'd have a hell of a time coming up with a story. So, how'd that work out with Morgan?

6/15/2005 11:22 PM  
Blogger Emmanuel.K.Bensah II said...

I suspect Joey's use of the word "boy" speaks volumes about her feelings for him, no? You like a boy, but you shag a man...as it were...

I think...

6/16/2005 5:53 AM  
Blogger Emmanuel.K.Bensah II said...

...and Morgan is a man!

6/16/2005 5:54 AM  
Blogger Joey said...

Lol, you're all crazy!

Wayne - Morgan and I are not dating, I'm not his girlfriend, and he's not my boyfriend. We're just very good friends, with very good sexual relations!

Ekbensah - Hahhaha, Building Boy needs to grow up, it's sad because aside from being sexually attracted to me - he really does like me very much. He's just too immature to realize that when he's ready to date me, I wont' be around anymore.

6/16/2005 10:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ummm, Could you please post again...I'm starting to have withdrawls. The shaking and cold sweats are starting to get to me

6/18/2005 11:43 AM  
Anonymous Sasha said...

You said: "He's just too immature to realize that when he's ready to date me, I wont' be around anymore."


I say...Aint that the truth, too often!

6/19/2005 5:24 PM  

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