Wednesday, May 11, 2005

But Officer

Last night I decided to go to Barnes & Noble to find a new book to read.
Driving on the highway, it's a beautiful twilight sky - not too dark, not too light out. Windows down, hair blowing in the wind, good music on, and chatting with my good friend on the cell phone. As I merge from one highway onto another... I spy a State Trooper in the left lane who's just made eye contact with me. - DAMN!
Inevitably he pulls me over... DAMN DAMN DAMN.

He walks over, a tall black man (somewhat nice looking), - License & registration... I fumble through the lollipops that fill my glove compartment looking for my registration. I can't find it - I look up at him and apologize, surprisingly he's quite nice and says that's ok take your time. While I'm searching for the reg. I'm hoping that he sees the PBA card marked that I'm a Nurse in my window (No, I'm not a nurse - I just know the right people in the right places to get me that!) Meanwhile, I find it and then give him my expired license with the registration. He looks at me and says do you know why I pulled you over.... I take a minute and consider telling him that my sister just gave birth and I had to take the call... I don't know what came over me - but I just couldn't do it - I looked at him and in a soft defeated low voice... I was on my cell phone. I was thinking that the cuteness of that would get me out .. it didn't.
I wanted to say Hey please lets make a deal, I'll suck your cock right here right now, just don't ticket me. Unzip those pants and I'll suck you right here through my window.. (hot)
Back to reality- HA I would never do that!

He went back to his car ..... 18 minutes later - yes 18 freaking minutes later. He says over his PA - Driver please step out of the car... I thought that's what I heard... I looked at him in the mirror and he motioned for me to go over to him. I wasn't sure what to do at that point.. As a woman I didn't find it very safe for me to step out of my car... but at the same time he was really nice and he definitely was a trooper. So out I step, I walk over to the passenger side (because he pointed for me to) but also because it's a safer side away from traffic. I bent over into the window - yes he had a clear shot of my cleavage - meanwhile he asks if I've recently renewed my license and points to his computer where it shows that I'm expired. I pretend I have no idea I was suppose to... He lets me off for the expired license, has me promise him I'll renew it tomorrow and gives me a ticket for the cell phone.

I still haven't renewed it... I'll get to it.

7 Comments:

Blogger Emmanuel.K.Bensah II said...

And here was I thinking ur story was going the way of some cheesy porn movie. Darn.

5/12/2005 6:08 AM  
Anonymous SJR said...

Wow, you guys get tickets for cell phones? Shit!!! I would be in BIG trouble if that were the case out here!

But I think the lollipops and the cleavage shot probably got your way out of a ticket for the license :) I know I would be horrible with that if I were a cop.

Though I've always had that fantasy of getting it on with a hot lady trooper or CHP when I got pulled over. But the only time that I've ever gotten pulled over by a female, she had her hand on her gun the whole time... definite buzzkill.

5/12/2005 9:12 AM  
Blogger Michael K said...

18 minutes?!? I would've fallen asleep. I hate sitting there while their checking your info, because your thinking, "my shit is going to get raped in jail tonight!"

5/12/2005 11:31 AM  
Blogger Sun Rider said...

I'm with SJR. The only time I got pulled over by a female cop, she was pretty good looking, but she had a burr so far up her ass a construction crane couldn't pull it out. Then she got more pissed that I showed her my 0-60 in at least 6 seconds car could NEVER have gotten up to 55 in a 35 in 100 yards. Never piss off a guy with a decent math education!

5/12/2005 2:31 PM  
Blogger rodtalks said...

and how about the book???? did you find anything interesting??

5/13/2005 9:33 PM  
Blogger Joey said...

I ended up not finding a book b/c I HAD to get home on time for the Amazing Race Finale... dont make fun of me!

5/18/2005 5:22 PM  
Blogger Friendly Daddy said...

I wouldnt make fun of you, I love The Amazing Race too lol

5/19/2005 1:27 PM  

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